Mob Match 2013, report and results

It’s 8pm and I’m armed with two mince pies and mug of coffee to try and write a race report for today’s Mob Match. Just as an aside, husband who plays golf and doesn’t run and I, are trying to complete a Mince Pie taste challenge. Tonight it’s Tesco’s Finest v Aldi’s Holly Lane variety. Tesco is winning this one.

Sorry I digress, but do mince pies count towards carb loading????????? Waist expanding maybe, but a 6 mile pre breakfast run might alleviate that problem?

So, this morning I awoke to another chilly morning with poor “Sydney Skoda” covered in ice and me not wanting to emerge from under my duvet, but breakfast was required with a reasonable gap between it and a race so I had no choice, but to get up.

Porridge consumed, internal body heat rising and Sydney has defrosted all on his own, due to some clouds bringing the outside temperature up a notch. It isn’t raining, there is no wind at all, so things are looking good for a 5 mile run.

Today’s Mob Match has a new race HQ. This year it is at The Falmouth Hotel with the race start/finish also being in a different place, outside the hotel. I arrive at Falmouth nice and early, and I’m able to park on the sea front, not far from the hotel entrance. Fantastic!

I wander into the hotel, following the signs to the registration point, and I’m informed that someone from TRC has already collected the race numbers. I am then informed that I now have to vacate the main building and walk around the building to it’s annex where all the runners are gathering and where the presentations will be held later on.

Sat at a large round table along side some Carn Runners, is Chris Ramsey, who today is Alison’s substitute. I’m presented with my race number 66. Thank god it’s not 666, the sign of the Devil, and then I’m assigned the task of finding some pins to attach race numbers to vests. I wander out to the table at the front of the Race HQ where you register to run this race and grab a handful. I’m then told to take only two. Two! Yes, two, that’s all you need to pin your race number on with. “8 Pin Colin” had better have come well prepared, or else he is going to have problems with his race ritual! Anyway, I ignore this lady’s protestations, grab a handful, whilst pretending to be deaf, and make a hasty getaway. 2? My race number would have flapped all the way round the ruddy 5 miles.

On my return to the table with my palm full of safety pins, Chris shows me the list of TRC runners and it is very pathetic. I sit with Chris and we wait for the pre entered TRC runners to appear, most do, but we have Two “NO SHOWS”. This leaves us short on money due to Falmouth running club who are running this event. No time to worry about this now as toilets need to be found and what layers of clothing to wear, has to be decided.

The toilets are very smart. A short queue for the ladies, but we have 4 cubicles and masses of soft quilted toilet roll in a clean hotel environment. Well done Falmouth Hotel. We could also, if desired, use the public toilets situated just above Castle Beach, but why venture into a cold dank environment, when there is warmth and cleanliness en suite.

So the small band of TRC runners consist of, Chris, Luke, Richard, Dave, Diane, Wendy, Tabitha and her mum Helen, Nick plus me. I think there may have been one more but my brain fails me at this time so sorry if I haven’t mentioned you by name. [Rob and Geoff.]

Geoff out for the club

We all make our way out onto the road at the back of the hotel which has been closed to traffic and wait for the race briefing. I hear the usual instructions, then with Garmin primed and Tabitha to my left, the horn sounds and we are off.

It’s a slow start with quite a bit of jostling. One lady cuts right across my path nearly sending me flying, but gradually I start to clear the “slower than me” runners and find some space. Tabitha has long gone so with no other TRC runners around I try to settle into some sort of pace. We’ve started on a slight downhill, before turning right into Castle drive and a grind upwards.

This uphill thankfully isn’t affecting my lungs too much, but my thighs are burning with the effort. This is where all you seasoned runners will tell me I should have done a warm up run beforehand, but if I did that, I wouldn’t have enough energy to complete the race. I’m a warm up as you go, sort of girl!

The road levels out after the viewing bays overlooking Falmouth Docks, then starts to head downhill towards Pendennis Point. I pick up some speed and the legs are feeling fine now. As the road bears right at Pendennis point, the sea comes into view. It’s that wintry grey but flat calm with just a couple ships moored up out in the bay.

Mile one arrives and the runners are now gradually thinning around me. I can see the lead runner along way ahead of me on Cliff Road and before long I’m turning left and doing the same. I don’t see anyone I know running around me, which is unusual, so I start to wonder if I’m running much slower than usual, but “hey, Just get on with it” I tell myself, and I’ll find out at the finish if I’m slower or not.

Cliff Road is also slightly down hill with it levelling out in the second half when almost at Gyllyngvase Beach. There are people supporting all the runners right along Cliff Road, which is fantastic, and I hear one person call out my name (thank you Pat from Hayle runners).

We now turn left along Boscawen Road and the next uphill section. This is where the male who has been missing in most of my races this year, resurfaces…..Porn Star is back! Now he isn’t the same one from the Drogo 10 of 2012, but he is giving that one a good challenge in the moaning stakes. And when I say moaning I don’t mean him coming out with the odd, “oh how I hate hills” comment, I mean Porn Movie moaning.

OMG, you must all think that I must watch these type of movies to be able to make this statement, well I don’t, but back in the very early 1980’s my male colleagues did and I would rush out of the room, highly embarrassed as they put the video on. Oh to be 19 again….maybe not.

So I have Porn Star alongside me now, but another downhill section arrives, as we run past the Grave yard and down to Swanpool. Thankfully his distress has eased, as has mine, and peace falls around me. All I can hear is the different footfalls around me. There is dainty pitter patter footfall which is then joined by a flapping style of footfall, I wonder what my feet sound like, quiet I hope?

We now run alongside the lake at Swanpool, keeping it on our right, and up ahead is Pete armed with a camera taking photo’s of us TRC runners. I’m the one in the Buff………… last years Mob Match Buff, which I am wearing on my head with all my hair tucked into it. Not a pretty site, but it keeps the hair out of my eyes.

David and Chris at Swanpool – smiling too much = not working hard enough?!?!?!

So around the back of the lake we all run and then it’s up past the Grave yard, the last uphill of this race, and I’m still running. No walking for me today. It’s at this point I spy “Our Diane” so wave at her, she’s still smiling, but we can’t high five, due to traffic also being allowed along this section of the road.

1 mile to go. Firstly downhill towards Gyllyngvase, than it’s a slight grind all the way back along Cliff Road to the finish line at the Falmouth Hotel. I can hear a female behind me, and she appears to be catching me up. There is about 300m to go, so I increase my speed and pull forward. It’s a sharp left turn into the car park of the hotel and I need to sprint for the line. Thankfully for me, the female, whoever she was, doesn’t overtake and I’m not bent double wanting to throw up.

Down the funnel we all walk, then I pick up a cup of water, a banana and what will this year’s race memento be? Another Buff would be fab, no it’s a small red cotton drawstring bag with a…………wait for it………a plastic Poncho. Now that’s a first. I could have done with it about 10 years ago whilst visiting the theme parks in Florida. Not sure when I’ll use it at the moment, but maybe I could wear it whilst marshalling next years “Meet your max” along with the riding whip??????

Time for a cuppa and recovery Snickers Bar. Chris and I are having a chat when one of the race organisers approaches wanting our race entry monies. This then becomes very embarrassing, because due to TRC debtors who pre entered but not paid and then to top that, failed to turn up, we are short of £22. Chris and I don’t have that amount on us, so one very unimpressed Falmouth Road Runner leaves with us promising to post a cheque to the race organiser ASAP! Please DO NOT  put us or anyone else in this position ever again. Pay up, or don’t enter!!!!!!!! Or I might just name names! Grrrrrrrrrrrr!

So it’s time for the presentations. We are crammed into a small annex building and I’m stood next to Diane and “8 pin Colin”. Colin and I discuss the Poncho, and he is of the opinion that it is one of our finer race mementos, and he might wear it around the house. I’ve just turned into a perve. I’m now visualising “8 pin Colin” in his poncho and this vision doesn’t include a lot else. Snap out of it Hana, Time for your medicine and time to go home. Too much excitement for one day.

Diane at the presentation

The Mob Match presentations do go on forever, and I will have to wait for another day, to see what my memento for completing 8 GP’s is. Last year it was a glass trophy and a can of glass cleaner. I pass Chris a carrier bag and make my exit leaving both Chris and Dave to collect any TRC age prizes one of which should go to STEVE RAWSON, our most elusive runner.

So all in all:

  • The parking was either on the road, or in car parks all of which were free.
  • The race HQ was fine, but the room for the presentations was a tight squeeze.
  • The toilets were faultless….speak to Richard for a low down on the public ones by Castle Beach.
  • No Showers.
  • Tea, coffee and bacon baps could be purchased from the venue as could a full roast lunch if you pre booked a table.
  • The route was the same as usual, but really quite scenic for a town run.
  • Will I run it again, I don’t know, but if I don’t turn up, the TRC numbers will be even less.


NB. More photos on Facebook  (it’s an open group, come and join us!)



One thought on “Mob Match 2013, report and results

  1. Good report again Hana … and to clarify the NO SHOWS (yes, deserving of capitals), I was one of the guilty parties and was greatly mortified to discover this only at club night on Wednesday. It seems I must have asked Alison to enter me ages ago and because of the system then operating never caught up with her to pay my entry. Closer to race day I had decided to wouldn’t be there and seemingly had erased all memory of entering. It is not my habit to enter and not pay; nor to simply not turn up without letting others know who might take my place. I would never want to case such embarrassment for the club or for those faced with demands for payment of my fee. Deepest of apologies all around. The fee has now been paid and such an incident seems less likely to recur with the efficient way Andrew is handling things. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Tony

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